My Apology to Susan Dell

If only I were only rich…
If I could quit my job, I’d have time to train too…
If I could hire personal trainers and the best coaches, I’d finish an Ironman too…
It must be nice being one of the richest people in Austin.
What does she have to worry about?
She can train all day if she wants to. It’s not like she has a real job…
Her husband is Michael Freakin’ Dell.

Those were my exact sentiments when I heard that Susan Dell was training for the Ironman World Championships in Kona back in 2003. “Oh big woop,” I thought. “She’s a gajillionaire with all of the best trainers at her disposal. I could do that too if I could train anytime I wanted to!”


I’m here to formally apologize to Mrs. Dell.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last four months, it doesn’t matter who you are or what status you hold in this insignificant earthly life of ours. You still have to do the work to get to the Finish Line. Money was no substitute for her 6 hour bike rides. The best coaches didn’t do her brick workouts for her. She still had to get her butt up everyday and swim, bike and run. And you know what? She probably sacrificed a hell of a lot more than I have. She has young children. I don’t. She and her husband have their names and reputations on multiple businesses here in Austin including Dell Children’s Medical Center, Dell Children’s Museum, Dell Diamond baseball field and, oh yeah, Dell Computers. The only thing I’m sure my name is on is some random bathroom stall somewhere, but that’s a story for another time.

So Susan Dell, if you’re reading this in between your own philanthropic endeavors, I’m sorry. I now know what an incredible feat you accomplished and I regret diminishing that achievement based on my own petty selfishness.

Now, can you pull some strings and get me into Kona too someday?? You Rock!
(Dell Rocks)

4 thoughts on “My Apology to Susan Dell

  1. BwahahahahaThis cracks me up. Nevertheless, I still think there is a certain nobility in the true, working age grouper without all the coaches, nannies, and spare training time. And what does that bathroom stall say? “For a thoroughly painful and exhausting time, call 555-1212”

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