Good Lord–just when I get cynical and grumpy about Austin, we have a weekend like this last one that restores my faith that this city is, in fact, a little slice of heaven on earth.
This hilarious infographic about why not to move to Austin (created by: Kami Russell) has recently been making the viral rounds.
I love (and live) so many of these ridiculous stereotypes that I actually feel like the Austin poster child. Holy shit…I remember moving here over 15 years ago. It was July. It was also 108 freaking degrees. Of course, at the time, I was like, “This is awesome!” I would just hang by my apartment complex pool, soak in the sun (with no sunscreen, of course) and wonder how anyone could ever get sick of the heat. Fifteen years later, hubster and I plot vacations that get us the hell out of here for weeks on end. Our lakes are drying up and we’re now meeting with landscape architects to plant f*cking rocks in our yard since nothing else grows in the patch of dirt that used to be grass.
I also remember my apartment locator telling me how super easy and quick it was to get around town. I grew up in the suburbs, so naturally, I thought I wanted an apartment in the suburbs (ew). I wanted to be close to the bank (like when you used to go *in* the bank), the grocery store (for all of the cooking I didn’t do) and the Blockbuster Video (enough said). I lived in North Austin and commuted downtown every day…15 minutes tops. Nowadays, it would probably take me 15 minutes just to get to the Mopac entrance ramp. As the years passed, so did my moves closer and closer to downtown. I went from the 59, to the 04, down to the 45 and back up to the 03. There’s nary a bank or Blockbuster in sight. There is, however, a vegan restaurant and a smoothie bar up the street that I frequent because, as a card-carrying Austinite, it’s the law. And yes, I talk about kale…a lot…(Mainly because people are very concerned about my protein intake).
It’s also amazing how many other things are different (or just gone) since I moved here, thereby pretty much qualifying me as an official Austinite by birth. In many ways, my move here was a “birth” of sorts. I was about 50 pounds heavier when I rolled (literally) into town and totally had the chubbiness anxiety. I remember thinking, “No one here is old OR overweight!” In 1998, I would’ve been one of those people who would’ve had a 0.0 sticker on their car while flipping off goofy cyclists who wore spandex. I didn’t know or care who Lance Armstrong was because, well, no one really did (things do come full circle). The only physical movement I did was walking from our old office at 6th and Lamar (which was recently torn down for condo development) down to Shoal Creek Saloon. For better or worse, my life couldn’t be more different than it was when I decided to get the courage to walk into Runtex (which was also torn down for condo development) back in 2001.
Even with all the changes, it’s still an amazing place to live. This weekend was definitely one of those, “On Earth as it is in Austin” weekends… For locals, however, it was also one of those weekends that make us nervous. It was so perfect that you just KNOW more people are taking notice. It’s kinda like having the hot boyfriend or girlfriend. They’re yours, but you always know other people also have their eye on them.
Well, like artist Kami Russell says, “Austin Sucks. Don’t Move here.” Or, like a crazy girlfriend protecting her man, if you move here, I’ll cut you.
Now, it’s off to go SUPing and mountain biking on another crappy January day….after yoga, of course.